Today, I am sharing with you a mini coursethat I put together on self-discipline, how to do what you say you willdo. So, what we're going to cover, what is it? Why does it matter? What's thesecret to keeping promises to ourselves and how to make it impossible to fail? So,if we've not met, my name is Mande John. I am an ADHD coach for adults. So, what is it?Let's talk about the difference between discipline and self-discipline. So, the practice of trainingpeople to obey rules or a code of behavior using punishment to correct disobedience. So, as wecan see here, discipline has that. Punishment factor self-discipline is the ability tocontrol one's feelings and overcome one's weaknesses the ability to pursue What one thinksis right despite the temptations to abandon it.
So, the ability to take action despite physicalmental and emotional deterrence is self-discipline Coaching and self-coaching or willpower. So whywillpower doesn't work? So, I have an example here of a beach ball and willpower is a resource thatcan be exhausted. And the example of the beach ball is you can push a beach ball underwater,but you can only hold it there for so long. And so, we can think of that similar to willpower.Why does it matter? How self-disciplined we are determines how we feel about ourselves. Weneed to care about ourselves enough to give ourselves the respect we would give others.What we are saying is we don't matter. So, when we let ourselves down constantlyis what I'm talking about here. Then we say that we don't matter, andwe need to make sure that we care about.
Ourselves just as much as we care aboutkeeping commitments to other people. So, the person you believe you are the person you willcreate. Why do we keep our promises to others, but not to ourselves? So, we are social creatures,and we don't want to be apart from the group. We keep our promises to be liked and accepted.We think we are only letting ourselves down, but that's not true. The truth is, whenwe let ourselves down, we are affecting others because we have less to give when wedon't feel good about ourselves. So, keeping promises to ourselves is simply a habit thatwe need to develop when we develop this habit. We can fire the manager. So, what I'm referringto right there is when we develop habits, we are going from our prefrontal cortexwhere we have the problem as adults with.
ADHD to the habitual part of our brain.So, we can start developing that habit of keeping the promise to ourselves. So,confusion, don't stay stuck in confusion. Ask yourself, what if you did know? What's thenext smallest step and how can confusion benefit us? So, what I'm talking about here is Confusioncan be an indulgent emotion. That's come up a lot with my group coaching and one on one coachingtalking about indulgent emotions and What I'm saying here is don't stay stuck in confusionabout how to develop that self-discipline for yourself So make it impossible to failKnow why you want to do what you want to do. What are your rules? What rules do we alreadyhave? And what if we had no rules? So, you can create a rule book for yourselfis what I'm referring to here. What are.
Your minimums and maximums? What is theleast you're going to do towards something and the most you're going to do towardssomething? What are your non negotiables? So personal boundaries, setting limits withourselves, make a commitment, no negotiation, just like we were talking about.Negotiating with your brain. So, your brain has its priorities to seek pleasure,avoid pain, and keep you safe. And oftentimes when we are trying to develop self-discipline,we are working against our brain's priorities. So, what if we miss? What I'm talking abouthere is if you have said you were going to do something and you didn't follow through, itdoesn't mean anything about you as a person. You don't want to give up and you can justtry again. Don't miss it twice. Be willing.
To be uncomfortable. Everythingis hard before it gets easier. Using feelings as fuel. How can you useyour feelings to move you forward on what you want? What would you need to feel?What would you need to think to feel that? And from that thought and feeling,what kind of actions do you want to take or stop taking? And celebrate your smallwins. When you follow through and when you do the things you say you will do, besure to celebrate no matter how small. Okay, so this is a mini course that is abonus in the ADHD Academy. If you liked this and would like more, be sure tojoin us over there. Thanks so much.